How Bored I Am (Sung to the music of How Dry I Am)

I'm watching "The Wedding Planner" this evening. You guessed it--Herr's out of town for one of his "conferences." At least that's the excuse I'm using. Truth be told, this is the ELEVENTH time I watched this movie. It's a guilty pleasure. Sue me.

In other news, Ella is continuing to draw huge breasts on her stick figure drawings. She has also added some glasses.

It's been a slow news week.

Ella's Artistic Endeavors

The girls' school is a sweatshop of arts and crafts production. Not a day goes by that we don't pick up the children and are bogged down by the tons of construction paper, staples, glitter, glue, marker and whatnots. Frankly, I'm fine with it because it is one less mess I have to deal with at home. Typically, the artwork is quite cute. The teachers have started to attach direct quotes from the children when they create their masterpieces and attach them to the art when completed. As one would expect, any direct quote from a four-year-old can be funny.

Last week was no different in terms of the volume of artwork sent home. One of the advantages of having so much of this is that I can be quite choosy when it comes to picking out pieces to save. This, for example, is clearly not one of Ella's best efforts. Methinks she was hurrying with this project so that she could go over to "dramatic play" and engage in some dress-up. The quote on this one is, "I made a school bus. It don't need windows because I like school buses."

















On Friday, I walked into Ella's class to pick her up. She asked me to wait because she wanted to finish drawing her mermaid pictures. I agreed and gathered her bedding and lunchbox and came back to her finishing up some small details on the picture. I noticed that something looked REALLY odd about the picture so I asked her what was up with the mermaids. She said, "This is a mermaid. She has hair and hands and mermaid breasts." For added emphasis, Ella pretended to twirl her nipples. Note: I do NOT know where my daughter came up with that move unless Ariel does it in the movie.

Mermaid Breasts.

The teachers started laughing and ran to tell some of the other teachers what Ella had done. Then she promptly wrote Ella's quote and taped it to the picture.

Then Ella asked if she could have breasts to help her swim in the ocean like a mermaid. Mind you, we're still at daycare. I told her that if she is anything like me, she will remain an A Cup through college and will go through a growth spurt in her 30's.

I think it is safe to say that this little gem is a keeper. Can't wait to see what comes home this week.

Taking the "PAL" Out of Principal

When I was a kid, the principal at my elementary school was Mr. Howes. He was a kindly balding man who was compassionate but firm, friendly and kind. He also didn't put up with much shit and had no problems using the paddle (they did that in the mid-70's, remember?!) Everyone loved Mr. Howes. Everyone believed that he wanted his school to be the best in my town. I am sure we all put him up on a pedestal, and he never let us down. I wish I could say the same for the principal at the middle school my children will be attending in a few years. It seems that the principal was busted for selling meth on Tuesday night. At school.

I am angry on so many levels. First of all, I am pissed that my tax dollars are paying the salary of a man who makes $97,000 a year while maintaining a side business selling meth. I am pissed that he showed such incredibly poor judgement by doing this activity at the school. As parents, we entrust our schools to keep our children safe and help them to thrive in an educational environment that is free of undesirable elements. I am amazed that the staff is so free in saying that they thought something was wrong with him, or witnessed his downward spiral, yet no one ever reported it--not even to the DARE representative who is based at that school. Frankly, their statements are only making me less comfortable in sending my kids there when the time comes.

I am utterly dismayed that when the police arrested him, they found him naked in his office, watching porn. While the whole act of watching porn on one's computer at work is nothing new, doing it naked is quite a bold move. I can't get on to some of my favorite sites at lunchtime to do internet shopping, but he can watch porn.

It is so hard for me to not judge this man. I am sure he is a good man who got caught up in a lot of bad shit. I can't help but think of the children and families he has helped over the years and how betrayed they must feel. Unfortunately, I am sure this case will only get worse. The press felt the need to report that he was watching gay porn as opposed to just porn, so I am sure it will be a matter of time before some parent reports an "inappropriate" relationship with his or her child.

I guess the lesson to be learned here is that no one should be placed on a pedestal.


UPDATE** Now the Bethlehem School Board has hired an unnamed law firm to investigate how John Acerra started down this path of selling meth. The article in this morning's paper says that the law firm will take as long as necessary to get those answers. Fantastic. Now the school board will be wasting EVEN MORE taxpayer dollars. Last I checked, this is the Police Department's job. Frankly, I don't care about the whys and the hows. I just care about the simple fact that it happened. We need to throw the book at him, have him rot in prison and move on. We don't need anymore irrelevant crap uncovered so that more comedians like Jay Leno can make this ordeal the butt of their jokes. Acerra just needs to go away.