I woke up on the morning of April 1st and was 40 years old. I didn't feel older, although I think I saw a few fine lines that were not on my face the night before. I'd like to think that the Vitamin E oil I am rubbing into my face every night is working, but I can't tell for sure.
I have looked forward to this day for a long time. Honestly, I never thought it would come. As a kid, I put it in my head that I would never marry, never have children and die before I turned 40. It's a good thing I didn't become a psychic. I would have been out of business within a week.
I started celebrating my 40th birthday in February with a Girlie Weekend in Mexico. In the back of my morbid head, I thought there was still time to not actually live to April 1, so why not do the celebrating early. It also helped that it was President's Day Weekend and we got cheap flights.
I didn't really freak out until the gifts started coming in on the day of my birthday. And the phone calls. I got phone calls from relatives who NEVER call me on my birthday. I got really cute gifts from my neighbors. My friend Amy flew to Nashville to surprise me the weekend before. My friend Katy called a spa near my home and set up a spa package for me. Even Corey went over the top with a beautiful (but too expensive) piece of jewelry. When I told Corey that that the trip to Mexico was gift enough, he said, "But it's your 40th birthday. This is a BIG DEAL."
A Big Deal. I realized on Tuesday that the "Big Deal" about turning 40 is the realization is that life is going by FAST. Too fast. My first 18 years went by at a pace that was torturous. I thought I would never turn 18 and escape from my hometown, escape my life. The last 20 years have positively flown by. I can only imagine how fast the coming years will come and go. That's what scares me. I'm having a pretty good time right now. I have a good life. I love and am loved. I just don't want that to end.