Wednesday, June 22, 2005

I'll take the Scrambled Words With a Side of Bacon

When I think back, I am utterly amazed by the things I have said (ideals, plans, philosophies) that have been completely blown to pieces--particularly with regard to my family. I now refer to them as utter fantasy. Here are just a few tasty morsels I have been forced to eat:

Fantasy--- My baby will never have a binky.
Reality--The binky was in Baby Girl's mouth as we pulled away from the hospital.

Fantasy--- I will breast feed my children.
Reality--I was unable to breastfeed Baby Girl because my milk never came in. I did, however, try to breastfeed Peaches. It sucked (no pun intended). Stopped breast feeding after the first day.

Fantasy--I am not going to feed my children hot dogs or other processed meats.
Reality--Please.

Fantasy--Timeout is a stupid punishment. Can't you just tell the child no?
Reality--There is a permanent stain in the living room corner from Baby Girl's nose being permanently glued to it. For the record, I still think it is a stupid punishment, but it's not like I can beat her.

Fantasy--I will NOT be a stay-at-home mom.
Reality--I lasted 5 months after Baby Girl was born before I left my full time job and started working 2-3 days a week. I am now home full time since the birth of Peaches.

Fantasy--I will not let my kids watch more than 30 minutes of television a day.
Reality--Without my friends at Noggin, I could not shower, talk on the phone, clean house or take a crap in peace.

I am comforted by the fact that I have not caved on one of my ideals:

I will never own a minivan!!!!

3 comments:

kimmyk said...

Fantasy-I'm only going to use cloth diapers.
Reality-10 diapers later someone better pass me the Huggies.

Fantasy-I'm only going to give them real food I blend up and freeze in lil ice cube trays and never give them processed foods.

Reality-I bought fruit deserts and cereal by the cases cause that's all they'd eat.

I had high hopes of being the "all american best mom in the world"-my dream was quickly shattered the first night I stayed up with a baby with colic and I didnt have any Mylicon drops to shove down his throat.
*sigh* To dream huh?

Candace said...

Fantasy: Everything will be wonderful with my children.
Reality: One special needs child (and mild at that) later, good god what the hell was I thinking?

I never wanted to own a minivan, either, but I have to tell you just how handy the thing has been during remodeling! An entire sheet of plywood fits in the back! And lots of paint! And a big ladder!

Misfit Hausfrau said...

I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy the features and benefits of a mini-van. It's just that we have this bet with my mother-in-law...